Relief and disappointment

So all the grades are in and I did very well overall. Three were way better than I dreamt of, one was exactly what I knew was coming although it got bumped up a bit because of the curve, and one was just plain bad. If you saw my grades it would look very bad in a lonely and schizophrenic sort of way. And yes, it is really a bad one.

But more concerning to me is how my section and my class as a whole will be affected by the final numbers being in. There were several very downcast faces today and I imagine it will be worse now that it is over. I suspect at least one or possibly two or three more people will leave. And there are rumors that a few may be asked to leave.

On happier notes, Scholarship Boy kept his scholarship, and Breakup Girl is pleasantly relieved. Divorcing Guy is dead even with where he needs to be. Several others, though, are very down or at least very disappointed.

Lil rum and reflection here, be warned.

Last year at this time I was in a very different place in my head. I was hurting from some serious failures, and newly minted with a pretty good LSAT score and a dream. I was a confused but moving forward girl.

So, I am still confused on some things, but affirmed hugely in others. Not just by grades, but by the fact that I have met some really awesome, totally unexpected people, and made some pretty great friends. I enjoy the freaky learning process of law school and feel that my age (which I had opined about quite a bit to friends and this blog) is an advantage and nothing more.

This past year I had some growing up to do though. I had to figure out that those "young uns" are very much the same as me. And who I am is not a number or a grade or even a failure (as I was quite convinced for the whole of 2006, right up till my LSAT told me I had a chance at a new dream). So I guess, the real point of all this is, no matter how old you are, you still have some growing up to do.