Tears of a child

My littlest girl is suffering from her very first MeanGirl friendship. She's seven.

Yep, you read it right, and a shout out to all the grown up little girls who totally know what that is about.

My little girl has come upon her first BabyBitch MeanLittleGirl . I mean that respectfully of course since this child is just a child, but she will grow up, if her path continues as is, to be One of Those Women. We all know them. The ones who think they are better, spend all their time in high school, college, sororities, offices, churches and every other place where women meet, running other women down.

I know this because 1) her mom is already one of those types a MommaBitch and 2) the little girl has chosen my seven year old as her target.

It started out subtly, at least on the part of the girl. My girl had formed a friendship with her immediately last fall, and they seemed to want a playdate. I dallied around and waited, because frankly I already had some interaction with MommaBitch and MamaBitch hated me before she ever spoke to me, so I didn't relish the idea of my child and hers being best buddies. I never said this to my child and in volunteer situations in the class, I noted that the other kid seemed to really like my kid. So, I approached MamaBitch, who said "call me and we'll set it up."

Ladies and gents, I was honestly thrilled. How stupid, right? But I had this idea at that moment that I had been wrong and that MommaBitch was really just like me and I had misjudged her. It was at the class Christmas party and I left feeling so full of peace and goodwill. I gave it a couple of days and called. No callback. OK. I called again and left a second message. Nothing.

Point taken. Maybe. I excused this in my mind because maybe she was busy, her kids were with their noncustodial dad, her message machine was broken, full whatever.

Flash forward. Early this semester on another volunteer day Baby Bitch, yes a child so sue me, told me I was not as scary and mean as her mom told her I was and would I please talk to her mom so she would know this. I could have picked my jaw up off the floor because who tells a kid this, ever? More to the point, my three interactions with MamaBitch in actual person had always been friendly, and though we do live ina very "we are snooty and you are not one of us" little subdivision, I am generally a well-accepted outsider. And heck, I am friendly and polite.

(Side note, this woman is one I have posted about before who seems to know me through another person who has reason to bad mouth me, he thinks - but still, come on, that is very far removed and would you really poison your kid's mind over some third party's gripes???)

Since then, that very day, all semester, my youngest child, a social butterfly and loved by all, has come home depressed most days from school and has slowly been having and increasing number of "tummy aches" and head aches and not wanting to go to school and you know the drill....Today she tells me she needs to see the counselor. She is being bullied. The BabyBitch has told her she hates her now, and has been telling my child for weeks that all her friends don't like her and none of the adults like her, and so forth. Ladies, again, I call to your wisdom, cause you know the "girlfriend" drill. This is how MeanGirls start, is it not?

My real quandry is - how do I resolve this issue for my kiddo? I have tried to tell her to ignore it (and for awhile she did, and hung with other kids, but now that recess is indoors all the time, she has access only to kids in her class who have to pick a friend and since the other little girl has known them since PreK and my girl has only been around a year....you know how that goes). I have tried to resolve it with the mom but truly, not since the "no call back" thing. My girl has asked the child for playdates in front of me (only to be told the child wouldcall her that night, and when she doesn't, my girl calls her and is ignored and not called back). My girl has become a sad and lonely kid in the space of two months, and I can't stand it.

Today I emailed the teacher. Gave her the basics and asked for help. Was that wrong? Is this a situation, even in second grade, that a parent needs to get involved in? I truly see my very gregarious child becoming depressed. If it were my third grader, I would know she probably had more part in her own fate, as she is more of an attitudey kid, but the youngest just plain isn't. She loved school and people until this mess began.

And is there more I should do with this mom and her inability to communicate with me directly? This is ridiculous. Mean Girls, coming to a Wannabe near you, eh? Was I out of line? What should I do? What should I have done?